WARNING: This post is a tiny bit lengthy.
I have been watching the latest season of Kim and Kourtney Take New York. Even though we all know that the marriage between Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries is a bust, it is interesting to watch their marriage unfold. As I watch each episode, it becomes more and more apparent how much this couple really didn't take the time to determine whether this was going to be the marriage they had hoped for. They were so busy seeing if they COULD do it that they never thought about whether they SHOULD do it.
This post is not about the Kardashian-Humphries marriage. However, as I watch their interactions it is painfully obvious that they missed a critical part of preparing for what happens after you say "I Do". Of course, not all couples will follow the immature relationship path of this celebrity couple, but it does drive home the importance of asking the questions you need to BEFORE you say "I Do" so that you can form a lasting marriage.
When cupid strikes and two people become engaged, what kind of questions do they ask? "What month do we want to get married in? Who should be invited to the wedding? What colors are we going to use? What kind of food do we want to serve?" The list goes on and on with details that will help make this day a very special memory for years to come. I love the details. Trust me, I do, this is why I am a wedding stylist. But the details are not the substance of your marriage.
During this time of year wedding blogs are flooded with advice posts on what to do once you are engaged to guide you through the questions above. I've even written a post like this before titled, You're Engaged... Now What? Planning the wedding is LOADS of fun. But sometimes the planning and designing overshadows the preparation for marriage and important issues get ignored. "How do we manage conflict? Who is going to handle the money? How will the roles and responsibilities be divided? Where are we going to spend the holidays?" These are all questions that should be considered and discussed with your partner at some time during the engagement and before you both commit to marriage.
Truth be told, as a wedding professional, it is none of our business whether your marriage is solid or will last. But here at Fabulously Wed, we care. I am not a counselor or a relationship therapist. Nor will I ask you any personal questions about your relationship. But I do want my clients to have a lasting marriage and to be truly prepared for the journey that lies ahead because as wonderful as it is, it can also present you with some of the most challenging times and difficult life decisions you will ever have to make.
Therefore, I share with you the Fabulously Wed Before You Tie The Knot Guide. Within these pages you will find the questions you should consider before you begin planning your wedding. Statistics show that most marital issues stem from pre-marital problems. I hope that you find this helpful as you navigate the waters of entering into a committed married relationship.